forAfriend Blog


Published 2013-04-29
Silently I wrestled the bear
though I felt a strange closeness
though full of fear
holding on tight to his belly
he couldn’t reach me there
he wanted to kill me there
Then at the end I had no other defense
I stood out in front of him
and with every last bit of effort and air I had left in me
Screamed “what do you want from me!”
He gave out a groan of careless lose
and sauntered back into the back forest

True expression of fear loses one own regard for ones own self, being solely afraid of the thing that is held in fear. You can only scream once you’ve become so afraid of the one you fear that even risking further danger to yourself cannot stop you.  A purely selfless expression of fear is rarely experienced because we’ve been conditioned to fear for our lives first and foremost. We’ve been trained to cover our mouths, to remain calm though riddled wThumbnailith terror we exalt our own best interests by not allowing ourselves to express it. When we fear for ourselves we keep quiet in order to protect ourselves from the looming danger that silence promises it can keep you from. If you should scream and be discovered, caught in fear, you will be very quick to rein back the terror you feel and then explain away your involuntary act of fear ashamedly. But it is only once we forget our own person that we can scream.   Until recently the fear of the Lord I’ve known has really been the fear of what the Lord might do to me and thus has kept me from really moving in the pure fear of the Lord which gives no thought to the danger it risks to my own being. Until I lose myself will I truly fear the Lord for who he is and enter into his glorious purposes and plans for my life. Only then will I be able to scream when he says, ‘scream’ though I may be causing a disturbance, seen and heard, caught being foolish, making others mad. My selfish fear of what others will think and do must be less than my fear of God.


God I’m sorry for being afraid for my own life and reputation over and above your Word. Make me fall facedown. Would you give me a revelation of you that terrifies, confuses, and leaves me submitted to you without regard for myself or anyone else just you. Cause I want something glorious that only you can give. I want you.


So go ahead let it out...and Scream!


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